When it comes to confidence, women have long struggled to find the balance between confidence and what others call or perceive as “arrogance.” When men give off confidence they are seen as strong and capable where many times women are just thought of “bitchy.” The confidence gap is real.
Many times, women fall into “imposter syndrome,” feeling that they don’t deserve what they have or where they are in their career. We’ve all heard the statistic that men apply for jobs when they only meet 60% of the qualifications, where women won’t apply until they meet 100% of them.
We as women have such a fear of not being good enough that it follows us in every part of our lives from fear of applying to the job to fear of not deserving it even when we get it. We don’t think that’s right.
Here are a few tips on developing confidence and allowing it to help you become a great leader.
First, let’s all work on practicing positive psychology and self-esteem. Let’s stop putting ourselves and others down and give women credit where credit is due. Do you think you’re not a good mom because you work too much? Or lazy because you stay at home with your children to raise them?
You can’t possibly think those thoughts up on your own. They are societal pressures and opinions from people who have never been in your situation. Remember, “the version of me you created in your mind is not my responsibility.”
When I first started running, I could never stick to it. I would try every day and within seconds or minutes into my run I would feel absolutely exhausted. A friend of mine told me I was running to the beat of my music, which was too fast. Sure enough, I started listening to slower songs and I was able to maintain a pace that didn’t wipe me out in 2 minutes.
In fact, I started listening to self-motivational, leadership, and confidence audiobooks. The pace was slower, and you aren’t going to quit your workout early when you’re listening to some incredible person talk about the amazing feats they’ve made. It also gives you a good mindset for the rest of the day.
This was an important lesson in running AND listening to advice. Network, learn, and surround yourself with positive people and material. You are what you read and who you spend time with. Surround yourself with confidence, discipline, motivation, and positivity, and that is how your day will go.
I lack patience. I own it, let people around me know about it, and use it to crank out work quickly and on time without fail. I use it to get the work done. And I rely on my patient team members to slow me down, provide their unique perspectives, and offer up their strengths in projects.
Accept your weaknesses and play up your strengths. We’re not all perfect. We need type A people AND type B people. We need technical AND thought-provoking individuals. We need people on all sides of the aisles. Know your strengths and use them to the betterment of the team.
Most of all, own it. Own you, your personality, your strengths, your weaknesses, your leadership skills, and everything that makes you unique.
What did I miss? What do you all think we can do to boost confidence in ourselves and the women around us? Join our community and newsletter for the latest tips and follow us on social to join the conversation!
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